Managing “No’s” During Mediumship Readings - Part 1

The Subconscious and Emotional Reactivity

For a student developing mediumship, getting a “no” is probably one of the biggest obstacles to overcome. Hearing the word “no” and all the emotionality and reactivity are tied much to the subconscious programming we received growing up.

Despite this, experienced and skilled mediums understand that a "no" is part of the process. They have learned it can be used constructively to refine and clarify the received information. It also encourages mediums to delve deeper, ask for more clarity from the spirit communicator, and ensure that the messages are as clear and accurate as possible. A "no" can also remind mediums to remain humble and continuously hone their skills.

The Story Of "Taylor Smith"

To illustrate this further, I will tell a fictitious story based on actual events. There is a medium; let's call her Taylor Smith. From a young age, she disliked hearing the word "no." This aversion began in her early childhood, during a pivotal moment at a local music competition.

Taylor, then a budding musician, had poured her heart into preparing for the competition, dreaming of the accolades and opportunities it would bring. But when the judges announced the winners, Taylor's name wasn't called. She approached the judges, seeking feedback, only to be met with dismissive "no's" to her sincere questions about her performance and potential in her music career.

This experience left a deep mark on Taylor. The rejection, coupled with the judges' curt "no's, seeped into her subconscious, embedding a fear of rejection and a profound aversion to hearing "no." This subconscious programming influenced Taylor’s behavior and decisions, especially when she went into mediumship development.

Throughout her mediumship development, Taylor avoided practice situations where she might face rejection or hear "no" in a reading. When she did hear a “no” to the evidence she gave, she completely lost her connection to the spirit communicator. She would feel embarrassed, frustrated, and even angry at her practice partner.

She could feel the emotions from the past that were reminiscent of her experience with the dismissive judges when a practice partner would say “no”. She began to choose her practice partners carefully and stick to types of evidence she knew she was good at to avoid being told “no”.

Taylor avoided practice opportunities and different types of evidence that, although potentially specific and highly evidential, carried the risk of rejection. She even told her practice partners they could not say “no” to the evidence. They had to say they weren’t sure, they didn’t know, or ignore the fact the information didn’t make sense.

As Taylor’s Mediumship progressed, her aversion to "no" became a barrier to her growth as a medium. She veered away from collaborations with certain practice partners and even teachers who tried to help her with her aversion to “no”, fearing the possibility of rejection. Her mediumship remained safe and unvaried. Her evidence, though accurate, lacked depth and specifics. There was no risk-taking or means to elevate her mediumship to new heights.

Then Came “Travis”, an Experienced and Skilled Medium

One day, Taylor met a medium, who we will call Travis Keys. He was a fellow medium and football enthusiast known for his experimental mediumship style and fearless approach to his mediumship. Travis’s curiosity and boldness intrigued Taylor, and they collaborated on developing mediumship together.

Taylor was inspired by his willingness to embrace the unknown and indifference to rejection and "no’s" during readings. She was impressed by his ability not to get disturbed by a “no.” He simply reworded evidence so that the sitter better understood it. He would also go back to the spirit communicator for clarity, allowing the spirit communicator to add more information to support the evidence via his other clair’s.

He told Taylor that the information she gets from the spirit communicator is correct as long as she is in the link. He further explained the issue with a sitter saying “no” to evidence is typically around the way the evidence has been worded. If she could work through the “no” and focus on wording and rewording the evidence, she would be able to land the evidence and go even further in terms of the story the spirit communicator is telling. She would also be able to get the specifics and the details related to the story.

Through their work together and conversations, Taylor realized how her aversion to "no" had limited her mediumship expression, evidence, and personal growth. She also became more confident that the information was correct; it was just up to her to translate it in a way the sitter could understand.

Taylor Overcomes Her Aversion To “No”

Determined to overcome her subconscious programming, Taylor sought help. She engaged in several mechanisms to challenge her fear of rejection and reframe his perception of "no" as not a personal attack, but a natural part of the creative process of mediumship and learning. She also practiced gradually exposing herself to situations where she might hear "no," learning to cope with the discomfort and move forward.

As Taylor Smith worked on her subconscious aversion, and as a result, her mediumship transformed. She began experimenting with new mechanics and techniques in mediumship, embracing the possibility of failure as a pathway to discovery. Her mediumship became more dynamic and expressive, resonating with clients, practice partners, and audiences in a way they never had before.

Taylor’s overcoming of her aversion to "no" taught her that true growth lies in embracing vulnerability and the possibility of perceived rejection. She learned that a “no” from a sitter was not rejection; it was just redirection. It was an opportunity to reword and go back to the spirit communicator to get clarity. In the mediumship community, Taylor’s story became a testament to the power of confronting and rewriting one's subconscious programming, inspiring others to face their fears and embrace the full spectrum of their potential in mediumship readings.

Hopefully, you can glean from this story (fictitious but based on true events) that hearing a “no” during a reading and the subconscious emotional reaction to it can significantly limit the ability of a medium to really have full-on communication with a spirit communicator. It can and does knock mediums out of the link and out of the receptive state. However, being able to work through that will lend itself to pure magic in terms of readings and spirit communication.

In part two, I will discuss more specifically the mechanics involved with working with “no’s” during readings so every medium can have the positive outcome that Taylor Smith did.